Lucky discussion
by Causeeverythingistaken
Summary: Ever wondered what's the difference between being in love and love? Do you think there exists some difference or is it the same thing? Read to find out!


_**A/N**_ _:_ Yo minna.. I'm back with a lovely bixlu story as promised yay! I'm sorry for posting this before completing my other work but i couldn't get it off my head. So sit back and enjoy. Spread love

And ohhhh... The italics texts are supposed to be flashback.

Disclaimer : i don't own fairy tail sadly :(

* * *

"Love is having the picture of Gray-sama on the insides Juvia's underpants".

"Ehh Juvia… Th-that's gross".

"Love is that stupid thing your heart does when it won't listen to your brain yelling at it to shut up".

"Ah Gajeel, I didn't know Levy-chan had this much effects on you". Gajeel simply grunted at the comment, rest of them chuckling slightly.

"I think love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK." A round of awws and kawaii went around at the guild at Asuka innocent comment.

"Powerful, mysterious and warm. That's also love".

"That isn't right Erza, Love defines me, I'm what the girls irresistibly desire. Isn't that right my Lucy". Loke said, popping out on this own again.

"Force gate closure, we don't need your pervy thoughts Loke" I said glaring at him, before he disappeared.

I found myself stuck between a very serious discussion (according to Mira). It started with a simple question that Mira asked me – _"What's the difference between love and being in love?"_  
At first, I laughed at this, I thought is there even a difference between the two? Aren't they the same thing? You are in love with the person you love, right? Or have I been wrong all my life? And before i knew it, most of the guild mates joined in the discussion making it impossible for me to leave. It went from discussing about what being in love feels to what love is.

"Do you know about the function e to the power x?" Freed asked. "I believe love is similar to the function e to the power x. You want an explanation?" he asked. Even though I was irritated with loke's previous comment, I stopped and continued listening. Freed actually might say something relevant.

"The best part about the function e to the power x is that it doesn't change, no matter how many times you integrate or differentiate it, Is that what you're trying to say Freed". Levy questioned, he smiled. Everyone else looked at them with confusion.

"Yes, What i'm trying to say is, love is similar to the function e to the power x. While the integration resembles the good times in our lives, the time when everyone and everything finds it easy to stick to us, differentiation resembles the hard times, when we stand on our own. And if it is love it would never cease to exist, never tend to change no matter whether the times are good or hard, just as the function e to the power x" he said. Everyone seemed to be content with his answer. Some of them nodding their head in approval while the rest had a small smile adoring their faces.

I listened to all their answers, whilst doing so, he suddenly popped into my mind and i realized something. I smiled.

"Interesting though incomplete " I said after a while.

"What did I miss?" Freed asked.

"Hence proved" I said and the three of us (Levy including) laughed. Rest soon joining us.

"Alright, so we now know what love is but the real question remains, what's the difference between them?" Lisanna asked and with that the discussion continued further.

I wasn't able to concentrate anymore, i was too occupied with the thoughts of him on my mind. I looked up to where he was sitting, and the familiar jittery feeling everytime our eyes met settled in me, His eyes were the glimmering color of ruby and I could feel him searching deep into my soul. It's strange how my world started to have more colors when he came around. I grew close to him and the rest of raijinshuu over the past three months faster than i imagined to be. I knew it then that I've fallen in love with his careful words, his smooth moves and the idea of 'us'. But i wasn't too sure. It changed drastically when i got to know him better, when I learned how he felt lonely most of the time, I got more eager to let him feel that he is not alone, that I'm here to keep you company. When he told me that he have had enough pain and heartbreaks from before, I wanted to be the person who can give you cure and remedy. I can't believe i'm only realizing it now.

* * *

" _Cosplayer, wah-what are you doing?" He asked, eyes widened and his hands trembling at his sides._

" _You don't need to wear your visor around me Bixy" i said._

" _But Cosp-"_

" _Listen here bix, You need to stop thinking about it already, it's been years since then, What happened in the past is long forgotten and nobody blames you for that. Your past is not something to be used to victimize. It is something that you can use to strengthen yourself from within. I would have done the same if i were you, don't be so hard on yourself bix. You are a different person now, You are thoughtful, gentle and caring, sometimes a perverted too but you need to believe in yourself Bix, in me, in your friends. You are very unique, even if you don't always see that quality in yourself. We will always be there for you, believing in you will always be there for you"._

* * *

And the first time i saw him cry, he was falling apart and nobody knew, but I tried my best to be there for him.

* * *

" _I failed them, the kid wouldn't have died if i managed to get there a minute early. I failed the mission, they don't blame me but i know, i've only proved to be just a disappointment". He spoke in a very low voice, i could barely hear him speak._

" _Hush Bix, it's alright, you're not an disappointment to them or anyone. It's not your fault it happened, would you be okay if i blamed myself had our roles been reversed? Our life is full hardships, we learn and grow stronger from our failures. Isn't that what Master told us?"._

* * *

It was then, he first time called me by my name instead of cosplayer. I will never forget how the butterflies in my stomach almost made me throw up for fluttering too much. My mind drifted off creating scenarios of him and me in my head which actually felt nice. Seeing a glimpse of him made my day and not seeing him kept me at bay. Before I knew it I was already falling in love with him. I wanted nothing more than to wrap him in my loving arms and shower him with reassuring kisses and to let him know that as long as I'm here, someone adores him unconditionally. I couldn't though. The thought of rejection made my heartache and I chickened out. I craved to be his only one, the one, who can wipe your tears away, the one who can replace his fears and doubts with self-love and self-worth.

As the group discussion went on, I learned that love and being in love are truthfully two different things.

"Being in love is manly whereas love itself is a man". I heard Elfman scream, earning him a smack on his head by Evergreen. I couldn't help but laugh and soon the whole guild was filled with laughter.

What i realized was simple, by trying to know ways on how I can make him feel better, telling that he deserved all the love in this world and my heart, for feeling too much emotion dedicated only for him, I realized that I was done falling, I already love him. There was more falling for.

"Being in love is the attraction, the butterflies and shallow sentiments he or she gives you, the temporary effect that you get from the moment you knew each other. And love is the firm decision that you are devoting your heart and soul for that person, no matter how hard the situation is and in spite of all the deficiencies that he or she has". I said. I felt every single pairs of eyes on me, My cheeks became a color to rival Natsu's hair. I saw Mira, Levy and Ever shoot a teasing look towards me. I smiled at them, i knew now what i needed to do. I quickly excused myself and got up from where i was sitting, my eyes already fixated on him. I wanted to let him know how perfect he is, and that he is wise, gentle, and kind, aside from being extremely attractive and cute when he wasn't putting up the pervert act. I was walking to where was, determined to confess but my mind suddenly began to fill with questions. Why is it that when we love, we always think of telling our feelings to the one? Why can't I just silently love him from afar? Why can't I be there at the sidelines, admiring and fangirling about him? Why is that I-have-to-tell-him-my-feelings urge there in my pumping organ? What the hell will happen after my announcement of kept love and hidden infatuation? What if all those interactions of him with you were just friendly gestures to him? What if it's just friendship to him? Life is full of uncertainty and doubt. So why should I confess?

It was too late for me to think of an answer, I was already standing a few feet away from where he was. Our eyes met for a brief second and something clicked inside of my head. It answered all of the questions i had, it's someone who i have a love-hate relationship with. It's HOPE _._ And i was holding onto that hope, I want him to feel the same way about me, so I'm here willing to risk of losing the fantasy completely forever.

"Earth to cosplayer, oyy… COSPLAYER". I heard Bickslow calling out. I opened my eyes, I hadn't realize I had them shut, and was greeted with his face few inches apart from my own. His alluring red eyes boring into mine. I felt a militia of chills march down my spine, my heart pounding rapidly. He was too close.

"kyaaa… Lucy kick" My cheeks suddenly kissed pink like a spring rose. I can't believe i kicked him, _damn Lucy you are an idiot, pull yourself together._ I mentally cursed.

"ouch cosplayer, why'd ya do that for? If you wanna flash your lacy back underwear, you have other ways ya'know". He said, sticking his tongue out. "That aside, What were ya thinking about?" He asked, leaning against the table in front of me. His muscles flexed slightly under his shirt. My eyes found itself wandering over his body. He has the kind of face that would stop every girl in their tracks if he wasn't always wearing the visor. He is so handsome it's as if his soul shines through his skin. I had seen him shirtless once and i must say his body was drool-worthy. He has a chiseled chest and the skin on it glowing healthily, his abdominals sculptured to perfection as his six-packs pop. I won't even forget about his arms for years. His biceps were lean and his triceps looked like diamonds - really rare ones, indeed - and completing his masterpiece of a body, his shoulders, round and protruding, give his whole look a new flavor. His brown skin so tempting to touch, I simply want to extend my hands and touch him but I also don't want to creep him out, I guess he could get used to that. I smirked at the thought of it. My eyes found it's way to his lips, my breath hitched in my throat. That was one of the features beautiful about him, it makes me want to feel how his lips move in a kiss, how his hands follow the curves of my body. My eyes met his. I saw him staring at me with amusement dancing in his eyes. I suddenly felt awkward, demure, and coy. My blush darkened until I was scarlet and roasting hot. I couldn't find words to speak. I was beyond embarrassed.

"I.. Ah- i wasn't really thinking anything". _Oh great, what the hell am i doing? I need to think clearly. Get a grip_ on yourself Lucy! I shook my head in hopes of dislodging my thoughts.

"ohh! That certainly didn't look like nothing cosplay-queen, Care to spill the beans already". He said his face cast as dead-pan as he could manage, yet failing. The left side of his faint red lip tugged upwards creating a sinister smirk on his god like face, holding a crease of amusement.

I was lost for words, My heart hammering inside my chest like it belongs to a rabbit running for its skin. I knew i needed to stop staring at him like a lost puppy, but my mind was too preoccupied with him. 'You are so in my head that the world around me reminds me of you'.

"Wait, what!" Bickslow said, His eyes wide staring at me in disbelief. Crap i didn't realize i said that out loud. Well it's time. I felt as though i was going to throw a fragile object at him, filled with all of my hopes and desires, and trusting him to catch it.

"Bickslow, I can't explain how or why, but, I know one thing for sure, I love you bix" I said grabbing his arm. I moved my head closer to his. He stood there frozen, from what i assumed was both fear and excitement. I didn't know if he loved me yet, but i couldn't resist. I leaned in, our foreheads touching. His very smell was flooding my senses now. I leaned in and gently kissed his warm lips. My head swam with half-formed regrets when he didn't return the kiss. I pulled apart, taking in shaky, shallow breaths. Tears almost threatening to fall. I was about to leave when he pulled me closer to him.

"Lucy". He whispers slowly, his voice low and husky prolonging each letter as if to savor them. I smiled, my heart fluttering at his voice. Never before has my name ever felt so wonderful i think.

"Lucy, are you sure you want me? You deserve someone better than me, you deserve what is best for you, which looks different than what anyone else has. Would you really be happy to be with someone like me?" he said, looking straight into my eyes, maybe trying to search some, any kind of doubts i would have. I showed him none.

"Bix, When i say I love you, it means I choose to love you, all of you. You don't have to hide your weirdness, cracks, imperfections that make you who you are. I won't tolerate your annoying habits and quirky flaws because I like them, I will honor them. I won't accept any less than who you are because I believe in all that you can be and I appreciate all that you are and everything you do. I want to share a part of my life with a love that overflows and stretches far beyond the depths of my feelings, and creeps its way into your soul. In you I find comfort. No conditions. No doubt. Just love. I don't deserve anyone more than you, and you deserve everything i said. I will find heaven on earth with you. You make everything more beautiful and being with you is a grand adventure, Bixy. Never doubt yourself. You are my one true happiness. Now that you know what I mean, let me tell you again, I love you."

His hand drifted to my hip. It settled there and pulled me closer. I inhaled sharply. I hesitantly looked up at him. The swirls of emotion I saw there made me gasp. Before I could ponder about it further, he yanked me to him and covered my mouth with his in a hungry kiss. As our lips crushed together, I felt like i was walking on air. It was magic, the way his lips connected with mine. His mouth was so warm, the caress of his lips softer than I could have imagined. I loved the way my small body melted into his, the way our lips fit like two puzzle pieces, the way I played with his hair as he held me tighter and tighter. When we broke away after what seemed like ages he looked at me. His eyes held so many emotions at once.

"I love you too Lucy, i have for a while now".

* * *

 _ **A/N:**_ sooooooo? How was it? Good? Bad? Could have been better?

I hope you enjoyed it. Please leave a lot of reviews and help me improve, as i said i'm new to writing so minna please do read, review and support me. Also i was hoping if you guys could help me with by suggesting some theme i could work on? Thank you for reading.

Arigatou~~~


End file.
